Linux and Getting Laid – Should I Switch?!

My x270 setup of Linux Mint, late 2022

Everyone who knows me either calls me Aphex Twin guy, Thinkpad guy or Linux guy. All of these are cringe, let’s be honest, and especially Linux. If you pull open a Linux laptop infront of a woman, you are getting nowhere with her (disregarding the personality and physique of the average Linux user, that is). That’s the truth. So, should you switch to Linux at the cost of your virginity? Keep reading to find out!

I’m not going to say use Linux for privacy or for freedom. Both of these are idealistic and not practical. You should be using Windows if Linux is making your life harder and you don’t care about Linux besides promoting free software. Linux is both a hobby and a tool. Just like tweaking cars, hunting or fishing is a hobby that has benefits (your car can go faster, you get free dinner), Linux is a hobby that can also be used as a tool. Not all hobbies are like that and for some people Linux just won’t work for them. If I edited videos for a living, I would never ever use or recommend Linux unless I was mentally deficient from severe zinc deficiency or the fluoride in tapwater. See Louis Rossman’s video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KOjCJXHJhPg

My point being: Use Linux if it serves you as a tool, or you enjoy it as a hobby, but especially use it if it does both – and all great hobbies do both. It will take time and effort for you to become proficient at Linux and to truly master the Unix way of life. It took me years and I’m still learning. Just remember that the fun is always in the beginning.

Just remember, operating systems are like cars. OSX (Apple) is a Tesla under warranty that is impossible to repair, Windows is a BMW and Linux is a 2004 Toyota Corolla. The Tesla and BMW look better, but the 2004 Corolla will outlive them all, be cheaper, easier, last longer, and is made with love.

Distros

My point being that Linux should be a fun hobby with benefits really ties in to what distro do you use. Well, what do you use? This server is hosted on Debian and I run Linux Mint. Very, very boring. It’s not fun, but I can totally have fun if I wanted to. If I were to have a hobbyist laptop that I were to experiment on and play around with for fun I’d go for Arch. If I wanted a stable laptop I needed for work I’d use Linux Mint or Windows. There are no distros that are intrinsically better than other distros. The more unstable, the more fun and the more you learn. The more stable, the less fun you have and the less you discover more about Unix operating systems. For example, I always recommend a new user to use Ubuntu or Linux Mint, an intermediate to use Arch or Void or something that a fat loser would use (GENTOO), and an advanced user to use Linux Mint. Linux is all about choices! But let’s be real, you came here for answers so I’ll give them to you: Use Linux Mint or Arch. All the rest suck ass.

Why Not Windows?!

My friend told me that no Windows user dualboots Linux to use Linux programs, so why should a Linux user have to dualboot Windows to use Windows programs when they can just use Windows?

My answer: I dunno. I just like Linux.

Linux for Those Who Don’t Care About Linux

Basically boomers and such. People who will never open a terminal or care about Linux. Should you give them Linux? The answer is: Depends. Honestly, Windows sucks compared to Linux for a complete boomer who uses their computer as a bootloader for Google Chrome and Skype. This is where Linux absolutely rocks. However, where Linux does not rock is if someone is a little more competent and plays video games, uses specific software (Microsoft Offices Excel, because Libreoffice Calc sucks), or any other proprietary software. These people should just use Windows. Basically to sum it up: Windows for my dad and brothers, Linux for my grandparents and mother, MacOS for my sister (if I had one).

If you are going to give them Linux, please don’t be a fucking nerd who’ll put Arch on their laptop. Get a life. Seriously. I have no idea why people do this and I see it all the time amongst Linux users. Back to the analogy with cars, it’s like giving your mother your modded out Civic that’ll break any second and only you can figure out how to fix it easily. Put Ubuntu or Linux Mint.

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